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Verse1

Won't you bring back, won't you bring back, Missus Murphy's chowder? It was tuneful. Every spoonful made You yodel louder.

After dinner Uncle Ben used to fill his fountain pen from a plate of Missus Murphy's chowder.

Chorus

It had ice cream, cold cream, benzine, gasoline, soup beans, string beans floating all around.

Sponge cake, beef stake, mistake, stomach ache, cream puffs, ear muffs many to be found

Silk hats, doormats, bed slats, Democrats, cowbells, door bells beckon you to dine.

Meatballs, fish balls, mothballs, cannonballs, come in, the chowder's fine!

Verse2

Won't you bring back, won't you bring back, Missus Murphy's chowder?

From each helping you'll be yelping for a headache powder,

And if they have it were you are, you might find a trolley car

In a plate of Missus Murphy's chowder.

Chorus

Verse3

Won't you bring back, won't you bring back, Missus Murphy's chowder?

You can pack it, you can stack it all around the larder.

The plumber died the other day; they embalmed him right away in a bowl of Missus Murphy's chowder.

Chorus

Note: Because this dish sounded so delightful, we asked a friend to make it for us. It was the best thing we had ever eaten! Since it was so good, we'll share it with you, if you pay us $ 348,415,437,575,654,915,676,231,546,352, 465,315,401,978,946,971,950,562,065,087,

365,716,056,075,634,865,8762,378,560, give or take a couple cents depending on were you live. For the money, we'll make you a trolley car full of this delicious chowder and have it delivered to your door. What a deal!!!!!!!! J J J

Macaroni Infestation Continued

This article is continued from the report featured in our November/December

Scientists are trying to learn more about this new species. They studied the macaronis found in the Shapes' wall. In case you are interested in learning more about the strange creature, we are giving you a brief summary of the known facts about the macaroni. If you wish to learn even more, read "The life of a Macaroni" By Daniel Palomak.

• Macaroni look like regular pasta from a short distance, but under a microscope, or even a magnifying glass, you can see that they have 3 eyes and 4 rows of sharp jagged teeth.

• Macaronis are closely related to leaches, except they are hollow.
• Macaronis move like inchworms, even though they don't have feet.
• They have exactly 27 cells in their bodies.
• Macaroni eat 2 white blood cells a day.
• They live for up to 3 years.
• They have approximately 777,777,777,777,7777.7777777777 77777777777777777777777777 million babies in a lifetime
• Only 3 known people have been infected with the macaroni. If you think you are, call 1-888-FAKENOZ extension 198687117 immediately.

Soon we will add our exclusive interview with people that had been involved in this incident.

Unfortunateley, we cannot add the interview because one of our interviewies was arrested. Sorry for the inconvienience.