Articles

Scientist Scott Palomac invented a new color!A transparent orangy-red shiny color,named by co-worker Mary Brown;Ojanoja.When plastic is made in this color,it can be made into glasses that give the wearer binocternal vision!This color was invented on February 17,2003
Veronica

First specimin discovered in orphans shack.It is pink and gooey,it grows on the ceiling,and when you touch it,it stings.It smells like horseradish.The mold is an acid.A test on popcorn made the popcorn shrivle up.This is what it will do to your lungs.The fungus will penetrate into your skin.The only thing that will stop this from occuring is salt.The chemicals in salt reverse the effects on the bacteria,but in doing so the salt dries out your skin.If you think you have any of this fungus in your house call the Fakenooz Research lab at 1-800 faknooz.
Penny

On Feebruary 28,2003 Mr.McDonald died.With no one to cheer them on,the McDonalds workers quit 1 by1 until only 3 restaurants are left in the U.S.The workers quit because they hated lying to customers.
"I hate not telling the truth."A former McDonalds employee said."And telling people that bacteria grown in sewage tanks mixed with pink fungus is a hamburger is a lie."only a couple people have died from eating McDonalds food.Mr.McDonald is going to be fined ,000,000 for these peoples deaths.
Cindy

"The sponge is 9 feet tall", claims a witness who wishes to remain anonymous. He was swimming in the ocean and when he stepped out to the 5' level, he started to sink on something squishy. So, not thinking, he jumped and a giant sea sponge rose out of the sea. Luckily, he grabbed a part of the sponge and called Fakenooz and our Fake Researchers determined that the sponge was composed of pink fungus. It was very unlucky that the person found the sponge. It is polluting the ocean.

We are trying to find out who put it there, so we can congradulate them. If you have any information, call us at 1-800-Fak-Nooz, or E-mail us at articles@fakenooz.00go.com

Our Fake reporters went to the reported location of the sponge. This was all they found.

A threesome (names not available), were walking out on a frozen Lake Erie when they struck gold!A snow mountain is loaded with "hashbrowns", little chips of ice that provide fuel."they can be found all over these snow piles."said one of the discoverers.This unfortunatly can not replace coal becausehashbrowns can only be found when there are ice piles,not whenever needed.Another ploblem is that the crystals can not be used for any kind of heat or light because they provide only a faint glow.
Penny